Small, but also big

I've often wondered how authors like George R.R. Martin and Patrick Rothfuss can spend decades seemingly doing nothing. Well, maybe not nothing, but not doing the thing everyone wants them to do: finish writing their next novel. And now, I feel like I have an idea.

For the last four months, I've been revising my novel in preparation for diving back into the query trenches. I have slaughtered darlings left and right. I have removed some of the adult elements to give the book a broader appeal. I have tightened sections here and there, and in general I am much happier with where the book is now.

At the start, I had a very good flow where I would revise a chapter every other day, and I was convinced I would have been done by the end of July. November just started, and I have made virtually no progress for nine weeks.

To be fair, I knew the latter half of my novel wasn't as refined as the first half, and would need more time to revise, but I never imagined I would get stuck like this. There is something about one scene in one chapter close to the end that I cannot nail. I have revised it several times, changed the approach, changed the characters involved, and it still does not work.

The annoying part is that I know exactly what needs to happen. It's a turning point for the protagonist. A wake-up call. It's even foreshadowed. Compared to everything that has happened in the book, this event is minor, both in scale and emotionally, but it is the straw that broke the camel's back. And getting the right mix of small, but also big, is hard.

The scene is crucial. I cannot just drop it as the book does not work without it. I am sure I will nail it soon, but it has stumped me for weeks on end, and it got me thinking about George R. R. Martin.

I am currently writing only for me, no audience, no one expecting anything, and I am stuck. Imagine having millions of fans awaiting your next book, and there's just something you can't nail? We all saw how the TV show ended, and maybe it was close to what Martin had told Benioff and Weiss when they started making the show. But the TV show certainly didn't nail Daenerys' fall, and maybe that's where GRRM is also stuck right now? Just like I am, but on a much larger scale.

The smallness of the straw is what's stumping me. It needs to be minor because no one else sees it coming; it is an entirely internal struggle for the protagonist, but a hand wave for everyone else. It's like a protagonist who thought they were the chosen one suddenly realizing they are not. Maybe there was a small earthquake just Arthur tried pulling the sword out of the stone, and years down the line, he learns of the earthquake. It does not diminish the actions that have happened since, but it shatters his sense of self. He's still King Arthur and has his Knights, but he realizes it was all chance. Maybe the example doesn't quite work as you could argue that the prophecy intended for the earthquake, but it's what came t mind.

Sometimes, it is the smallest details that can be the most challenging to tackle, as I'm clearly finding out now. And maybe it is the small details that's stopping Martin and Rothfuss too? In any case, I will continue banging my head on this scene some more. I am sure I will nail it sooner or later.

-- Amir